Make your Small Place Bigger—Without Adding On

让小空间变大

导读：每个人都想拥有自己的温馨小屋。但你是不是有时会觉得空间太小，房屋总是显得拥挤不堪？换个大房子当然是个不错的选择，可是换大房子可是件费钱又费力的事啊！其实，你只要用心把你的小屋重 新布置一番，也许你的房子就 会“无形”中变大啦。赶快学习下面的装潢小秘诀，一定会让你受益匪浅啊！

Small homes definitely have their advantages: less to clean, less to heat and cool, less furniture to buy. But at times, you're doubtless craving just a bit more room. Remodeling the house would be nice, but before you take on major surgery (and the home improvement loan that probably comes with it), try few simple tips that can make your space feel bigger.

First, realize that it's not all about physical size. How big your home feels is also a function of its lighting, furniture placement, sight lines, and traffic flow. Master these principles and you may find yourself not needing that extra room you've been contemplating.

1. Let There Be Light (and Flow)

The more light that flows through a space the bigger it seems. If you own your home, consider installing a skylight or two, particularly in the kitchen and bathroom. Skylights have the power of instantly brightening and adding dimension to a room. Sun Tunnela Skylights are a great way let natural light into a smaller space. Ranging in size from 10” to 14”， they are round and resemble “can” lights in your ceiling.

It's also important to open up your shades as much as possible. Replace heavy drapes with linen or diaphanous（透明的） curtains so that light can flood into your home without you having to forgo（放弃） your privacy.

Also, consider knocking down the wall between your kitchen and dining room or adding an indoor “window” between the two rooms so that the light (and sight lines) of the two rooms flow into each other. This will have the effect of making it more pleasant for you to entertain, since you won't be trapped in the kitchen while your guests socialize without you.

Can any of your windows be bigger? Salvage yards sell windows much cheaper than retailers, and replacing small windows in your home with bigger ones adds much more light to your space. Glass brick is a good option too. It offers complete privacy but can create a beautiful indoor/outdoor affect that opens up a wall tremendously.

2. Too Much Furniture Is Not Good Furniture

Time for the tough question: Do you really need all that furniture? Are there pieces that you don't use but are hanging onto out of sentimental value? Too much furniture makes a room feel overcrowded, disrupts the impact of good lighting, and impedes（妨碍） the natural flow of foot traffic. As difficult as it may be, getting rid of furniture that doesn't work anymore can be a great way to open up a room.

Most charitable agencies like Goodwill or the Salvation Army have a pick-up service. Many people choose to sell their belongings on eBay or craigslist.org. If you do end up opting to let go of that sofa from college or great-grandma's dresser, you may be shocked at how liberated you'll feel when it's gone. There's a reason they say it's better to give than receive.

Once you've weeded out your furniture, there may be a few odds and ends（另行物品） you need. Let accessories or occasional pieces take the place of those behemoths that were hogging（霸占） the room. As you rearrange pieces, see if any of your furniture blocking the “flow” from one end of the room to another. Remember what we're trying to do with light and sight lines and try to do the same thing with your chairs, couches, tables, etc.

Also, review as many design books and magazines as you can get your hands on during this process. Feast your eyes on rooms you love; if they're right for you, copy them shamelessly!

3. Walls Do Talk

Artwork（艺术品） and mirrors are fantastic tools for creating dimension in any space. For instance, if you want a particular corner to be for cozy conversations, why not hang a painting or photograph of two people engaged in an intimate moment? Want to make a big, bold statement about yourself? Hang a striking painting or photograph over the fireplace. The fireplace is generally the first place a person's eyes travel in a room. The more distinct your walls, the bigger a room will feel.

Finding art for the walls should be fun and it needn't be expensive. Keep your eyes open at local restaurants, small galleries, and studios to spot up and coming artists. Remember that almost every successful artist had a period in which his or her works sold for very little money. Somebody has to spot the next Hockney or Rothko—why not you? Focus on pieces that speak to you, that fit the size of the space you've got, and that help reinforce the mood of the room you plan to place them in. Being a patron of the arts will make you feel rich, but you can find plenty of quality artwork for under $1000.

Now if your budget is a bit restrained, you can always find a nice quality photographic print for under a hundred dollars. Framing stores and big box retailers usually have the best selection, but you can also find terrific bargains at online auction sites as well as flea markets.

The cheapest and perhaps most fun way to create dimension in your space is to get some adhesive-backed cutouts that stick to your wall. A recent design phenomenon, they come in all shapes, colors and sizes, from large flowers to Chinese vases and abstract shapes. You can decorate an entire wall in these forms and create a fantastic distraction from what might otherwise be a dull, windowless backdrop. The Museum of Modern Art (momastore.org) has a nice array of vinyl cutouts, which are also reasonably priced.

And never forget that mirrors are the ultimate way to expand a room, not only because they create the illusion of a bigger space but because they help create more light. Before electricity homeowners hung mirrors behind candles to reflect light and brighten a room. Apply this theory to our Let There Be Light rule and you can imagine what mirrors will do to your home. Hang mirrors opposite each other so that your guests' reflections march off into infinity and bounce even more light around. Entryways and dining rooms are especially good places for mirrors. This way, your guests get to sneak a peek at themselves before they join a party or sit down for a meal.

4. Paint is Power

A nice trick to use in a smaller space is to paint rooms different colors or just paint one wall so it stands out. Painting one wall will make it pop out, thereby adding dimension to the room you've chosen to embellish. Take this technique to at least a couple of rooms so that people will experience each color and space differently.

If you do paint rooms, work up an overall color scheme to unify your home at the same time you're creating distinctive atmospheres within it. Avoid high contrast and clashing colors in connecting or adjacent rooms of your home; for instance, if you paint your living room a soft wheat color, avoid bright red in the neighboring bedroom, as the results could be jarring. Colors should flow from room to room, just as the light should flow throughout your space.

Choosing bold colors can be a bit scary（提心吊胆的）, but you can put those fears to rest by testing the colors without committing to them. Buy the smallest container available of the colors you're interested in (some paint manufacturers even make 2 ounce cans for just this purpose). Paint a 2 foot by 2 foot section of cardboard or foam-core board, wait for it to dry and then look at it in place. Be sure to evaluate it during the day and night, so you can see how the colors respond to different types of light.

5. Clutter is the Enemy

The final step in expanding your space is getting rid of clutter. Are there books, cards, knick-knacks and memorabilia sitting in stacks? Is every end table（茶几）, sill（窗台）, and mantel（壁炉台） crammed with whatnot? A well-placed set of shelves or bookcases can make a room feel 50 percent bigger by finding a home for the odds and ends we all accumulate. Shelving（棚架） may help you actually regain a table or even floor space. Separate shelves can also become wall decorations themselves, housing photo collections, books, collectibles – anything you don't want blocking the flow of your living space. Yes, to get a spacious, clean effect you'll most likely have to toss a few items on the sacrificial altar of your former life. Don't fret, it's good for you—and you can always put things in storage.

No room should be immune to your space-making eye. Though they're rarely seen by guests, your closets can actually be a significant help in making your home seem bigger. Placing more of your belongings in the closets frees you from the burden of storing them in a room. Briefcases, bathrobes（浴衣）, shoes, printers, small appliances you seldom use—everything's potentially got a place out of view if you can find room.

Most big home improvement stores offer do it yourself systems that offer a far less expensive alternative to calling a professional to have a walk-in closet installed. You can buy and install a walk-in closet yourself for one tenth of the price; they'll help you stay just as organized. Take the same approach to other clutter-prone rooms like the kitchen, pantry, garage--anywhere there is the potential for you to have too much stuff and not enough surface area. Think about investing in systems to help you cut the clutter into your existing storage, such as cupboards and drawers.

You know less is more and it's usually just a question of re-orienting yourself away from the past with an eye toward an uncluttered future. Letting go is tough, but the reward is a bigger place—bigger because you've brought some openness into your home and into your life!

(source: http://www.msn.com)

Big-Earning Wives, and the Men Who Love Them

高收入妻子与爱他们的丈夫

导读：你是不是一个高收入的妻子？你是不是家中负担生计的人？随着女性教育程度以及社会地位的提高，传统的“男主外女主内”的家庭状态已被逐渐打破。许多家庭妻子的收入也远远高于丈夫，同时出现了部分“女主外男主内”的家庭。如何在这种新形态的家庭中找寻平衡点呢？在这样的家庭中又会出现什么样的危机呢？如何很好地解除危机而拥有和谐幸福的家庭？那就到下文中寻找这些问题的答案吧！

By the time Jane and John Metcalfe were ready to start a family, they had both reached a similar level of success. She was vice president of a New York public relations agency, and he was pastry chef（主厨） at a well-regarded New Jersey restaurant. They were typical Type A personalities working long hours in jobs they loved. Then Jane became pregnant with their first child, and they came face-to-face with the dilemma（困境） that affects all working couples with kids: What to do about child care? They didn't want to put their infant in day care. They couldn't afford a nanny. So after much agonizing, they decided that one of them would cut back on work hours to stay home with the baby, while the other continued to work full time. "My husband and I want to give our children traditional things — like a home and a backyard," says Jane, 37. "In the end, our decision came down to: Who had the better job in terms of salary and benefits?"

The answer was Jane. She's one of a growing number of women who've become the primary breadwinners（负担生计的人） in their families. What would have been considered an uncommon role reversal even 10 years ago is now anything but. One in three married women in America is outearning her husband, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics. "When I started as a financial adviser 20 years ago, there were almost no couples in this situation," says Bob Mecca, a certified financial adviser in Mt. Prospect, Illinois, a suburb of Chicago. "Now 40 percent of the couples who come through my door have a wife who earns more than her husband."

The simplest explanation for this change is a practical one: Women today are better educated and better prepared for the workforce than ever. "The number of women getting high school, college and advanced degrees is higher now than at any other point in history," says Randi Minetor, author of Breadwinner Wives and the Men They Marry. In fact, women today are more educated than men: In 1998, there were 125,000 more college-educated women than men, according to the Center for the Study of Opportunity in Higher Education. By 2010, that gap is expected to double. A survey on Redbookmag.com of women who earn more than their husbands confirms the impact of these trends. Most high-earning wives said they make the higher salary in the marriage not because they're more aggressive about job hunting or working longer hours, but typically because they are better educated, and therefore landed in a more lucrative（赚钱的） field.

But this arrangement also reflects a seismic shift in the way husbands and wives view each other, says Stephanie Coontz, director of research at the Council on Contemporary Families and author of the upcoming book Marriage, a History. "Women have earning power, so they're less intent on finding a husband who is a high earner and more interested in finding someone who is an all-around good partner," she says. "And men are letting go of the idea of, 'I should make more or have the more prestigious job because I'm the man.' Instead they're both saying, 'Let's do what's best for all of us.'"

It's a modern choice that reflects modern financial and cultural realities, but it also presents new challenges. The same conflicts that rattle every marriage — money decisions, division of household and child-care duties — can become even more fraught when she's the breadwinner. Yet it's also a liberating setup: Let go of traditional earning roles, and you're free to make lots of other choices based not on your parents' marriage, or anyone else's, but rather on what works for you. Here's how some very different couples navigate this new path — and what they've learned that can strengthen any marriage.

*Some names have been changed.

For many couples, the she-earns-more scenario（事态） allows both partners to pursue what they love. Victoria Cairl, 27, of New York City, who describes herself as career-driven, is able to work the kind of hours needed to get ahead in the competitive world of advertising because her husband, Jim, 30, an aspiring actor, cares for their two daughters. Jim, meanwhile, has the schedule he needs: He has time for auditions because he doesn't hold down a 9-to-5 job. It's that kind of out-of-the-box thinking that can make a marriage truly happy, says Coontz: "Instead of blindly following gender scripts — sometimes at great personal cost — more and more couples are arranging their marriages to play up everyone's individual strengths and build the best lives for their families."

Other pairs embrace this financial flip-flop as a way to have more time together. When Debbie and Paul Harrington married in 1998, they were workaholics（工作第一的人） — he was a software engineer and she was a technology consultant in San Francisco. Both were highly paid, but their fat paychecks weren't enough to justify the toll two big jobs took on their marriage. "We realized we'd jeopardize（危及） our relationship if we both continued working high-powered jobs," says Debbie. "We weren't seeing much of each other, and when we were together, we were exhausted." They came up with a plan together after returning home from simultaneous business trips that kept them apart for five weeks. "We'd have midnight phone conversations," says Debbie. "I'd say, 'I just saw the Great Wall of China. You would've loved it.' He'd say, 'I almost ordered the lobster（龙虾） because that's what you would've picked.' When we got home, I said, 'You don't want to live through me and I don't want to live through you, but is there a middle path we can take?'"

The answer the Harringtons came up with recalls a simple lesson they learned as kids: Take turns. Instead of working all-consuming jobs simultaneously, one would bring in the big paycheck, while the other would work freelance（自由地；独立地） from home. Debbie took her turn as high-earner first. As a senior partner at a technology marketing firm, she makes in the low six figures; Paul makes half that working as an independent consultant. "When you're both hard-charging people, it's hard for one to stand back and let the other make the big paycheck," Debbie says. "But now we actually get to hang out together, and that's worth more."

Another perk of the alpha-wife arrangement: The woman's satisfaction with her professional success tends to permeate（渗透） other areas of her life, says Scott Haltzman, M.D., clinical assistant professor of psychiatry at Brown University. "When a woman feels accomplished and appreciated, it elevates her state of mind, and everyone in the house benefits." That good will can even spill over into the bedroom. "We've never had a rough patch like some other couples we know," says Jim Cairl. "Being equals in our relationship makes it easier to be sexually intimate." Other husbands in this situation, such as Jake Whitsitt of Maple Grove, Minnesota, find that an alpha wife is often a happier wife. "Tanya is more fun to be around now," he says. Maybe it's because she knows that Jake — who works nights so that he can care for their two kids during the day — values her more than ever. "I appreciate her more in every way now that I'm handling a lot of the daily household responsibilities," he says. "Before, I knew they were there, but I had no idea how much time they took up."

This brave new world of marriage isn't without its pitfalls. As common as it's become for women to bring home most of the bacon, it's still a nontraditional arrangement, one that in-laws, bosses ?- even your dry cleaner — may not understand. "My parents were a little baffled by my choice of a husband," says Ria Romano, 35, of Boca Raton, Florida, whose husband, Gustavo Verdes, earns less than a third of her $70,000-a-year salary. "But what I tell them is my husband makes me happy in the simplest ways." A united front is key to keeping this arrangement strong, says Mary Hotvedt, Ph.D., former president of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy. Criticism of your choices can bring you closer rather than driving a wedge between you, she adds, "as long as you publicly stand up for each other."

And let's face it: Every man (like every woman) has an ego. It takes a secure guy to be okay with his wife pulling in a lot of the family money. "Many men define themselves by what they do," says Haltzman. "Guys who feel secure in their self-worth outside of work make the adjustment to this arrangement more easily." Sometimes when Ria Romano, who works as a marketing executive, suggests dinner at an upscale restaurant, Gustavo gets upset. "He has so much pride that he'll put his foot down and say, 'If I can't pay out of my salary, we're not going!'" A big earner can smooth the way by giving her spouse some ownership of her success — for example, letting him handle her PR at cocktail parties. "Give him bragging rights about your incredible job," says Haltzman. "That helps a guy know he has a role in your earning power."

Which brings up another he-makes-less hazard: battles over the proverbial（众所周知的） purse strings（经济大权）. "It's essential to give him a sense of control over financial issues," says Haltzman. "One of the most destructive things you could do to your marriage is say, 'I earn all the money, I make all the decisions.' Powerlessness is death to a man." Jane and John Metcalfe's solution: "We make all decisions based on a collective need, rather than on who earns what," says Jane. All their money goes into a joint checking account so that "his" and "hers" immediately become "theirs." Combining resources is actually common, says Minetor: "The majority of these couples pool their money, and the spouse with more time and interest manages it." That's a good idea, says Haltzman, because having to ask for money can be humiliating for the lower earner.

Even women who derive satisfaction and pride from supporting their families may feel torn about their status. "Many women have been raised to believe their salaries should be their discretionary income — for extras, like wardrobes, vacations, presents, treats for the kids," says Hotvedt. "A woman who outearns her husband often has to adjust to thinking of the money as money for the team to spend on basics, and not for herself." She may also find herself longing for a more traditional setup. "I've had moments where I felt, Why do I have to be the man in this relationship?" admits Ria Romano.

High-earning wives also have to shoulder an anxiety once reserved for men: What if I lose my job? The majority of the women who responded to the Redbookmag.com survey said they're afraid they'll get laid off and that their family won't be able to make ends meet; 38 percent said they worry about cash flow "all the time." Tanya Whitsitt is proud that her $42,000 salary — almost twice that of her husband's — makes it possible for her family to live in a five-bedroom house in a suburb of Minneapolis. But at one point, the pressure to manage her career became so overwhelming that she started having heart palpitations and suffered from insomnia. "I can't screw up at work," says Tanya. "If I lost my job, I don't know where we'd be financially." Her doctor prescribed antianxiety medicine, which has helped her deal with the stress of having to do it all.

And then there's the big kahuna of all female breadwinner issues: Who takes care of the baby? When she earns more, he often becomes the primary caregiver. That can make for a great bond between father and child, but it doesn't necessarily alleviate Mom's guilt about not being home enough. Like more and more dads, Jake Whitsitt has scaled back on work so that he can watch the kids during the day while his wife pulls in a big paycheck. He watches Gavin, 2, and Madeline, 1, while Tanya is at work; she's with them at night and on Saturdays, while he works. "We've both made sacrifices, but the benefits for our kids outweigh anything," says Tanya, a communications associate for the City of Eden Prairie, Minnesota. Her only regret: With Jake working night shifts, the couple has little time together. "Sometimes I wish I made even more, so I could be the sole breadwinner and Jake could be a stay-at-home dad."

Of course, not every man is cut out to be Mr. Mom. Men who go this route have to be nurturing and patient enough to handle 12-hour days at home with a 2-year-old. Which can be hard on her ego: Wage-earning wives admit to feeling a twinge of envy over their husband's success at home. "I always knew Jim was more maternal than me," admits Victoria Cairl, "but sometimes I'm jealous when one of the girls cries out for daddy in the night." Jane Metcalfe can relate. She says that there have been times when she's felt resentful that her husband gets so much face time with the kids. "I wasn't home for my daughter's first steps," she says. "Lately I've been thinking, it's my turn to spend more time with the kids!"

But breadwinning wives are overwhelmingly happy with their choices, according to our survey. "Three years into it, I'd say it's the best decision we've ever made," says Tanya Whitsitt. "Sometimes I have a crazy day at work, but then I walk in the front door and the kids yell, 'Mama! Mama!' and I feel their love and how happy they are. And my husband's there, cooking dinner, and I get this instant feeling of, Yes! We're doing what's right for us."

(source: http://www.msn.com)